Don't be shy, be fly, grow cacti!

The puns below reflect our nervousness about growing cacti, especially if you have small children who could injure themselves with a sharp specimen.

But all of us have to be careful as some of these spikes can be vicious. You have been warned but provided you take care, these low-care plants will reward you, taking on interesting shapes as they grow and producing surprisingly gorgeous flowers when they bloom.

They are the perfect architectural plant to grow indoors and you can even evict them to the garden to bask in the hot sun all summer (assuming of course we do see the sun, who hasn't made much of an appearance this year).

So where do we start? The common or interesting ones would be a good start. Here are three I can recommend as almost fool-proof plus an unusual one:

1. Golden Barrel Cactus (Echinocactus grusonii) is everything we imaging a cactus should look like - a round spiky ball of fun. I am not so keen on its other name of Mother-in-Law's Pillow! It is deeply ribbed, each of which is covered in creamy yellow spines. Woolly white hairs grow on the crown and cup-shaped, yellow flowers may form on mature plants. They can grow up to 25cm in diameter and do repot them as they outgrow the pot. Treat them like in previous blog on succulents, little watering, cactus feed maybe once a month, and repot with cactus compost. To handle, use thorn-proof gloves or try my method using a towel and several layers of bubble wrap to hold it to get it out of the pot.

2. My Prickly Pear Cactus (Opuntia Engelmannii) here and the less prickly Bunny Ears cactus (Opuntia microdasys) are cacti that a child would often draw when asked to draw a cactus. Mine is not too large but they can grow to huge sizes in the wild arid conditions of Southern USA. So water sparingly and feed as above. Mine has just flowered this summer (all those cup-like stalks held a yellow flower once, which can be followed by globular purple edible fruits). It can be quite fast growing: the new growth on the left and middle leafs have appeared over only the past 4 weeks. Interesting fact: the Bunny Ears variety do not have spikes like this one, but they have short whitish brown prickles called glochids. Beware, they still bite, so caution when handling them.

The next 2 are strictly not cacti if you are purist, but a form of succulent in the large euphorbia family, but they look more like cacti to most of us. And they definitely have 'wow factor'!

3. Desert Candle Cactus (euphorbia acrurensis or trigona) from West Africa has slender ribbed trigone stems with small oval leaves. This can branch and grow up to 8 feet tall indoors! The leaves do fall off naturally and regrow but if lots of them do, it could be too dry - again, do not overwater and let it dry out between watering. Usual cactus feed in summer. Please note like all euphorbias, it produces a milky sap (hence it is also called the African milk tree) which can be toxic or irritant so beware. The red leaf variety like mine I think looks more amazing. As these grow taller, you will need a heavier unglazed pot to plant it in and turn it often so it doesn't get lopsided growing towards the light.

4. The Coral Cactus (Euphorbia lactea Cristata) is a very alien looking plant which is top heavy and will need an unglazed pot like mine to support it from tipping over. For divers and marine aquarists amongst you, it closely resembles the Orange Fan Sponge (Axinella bookhouti) below.

It has a green thick stem and crinkled cabbage-like leaves, which come in either purple, green, ruby, white, or yellow colour edges (mine looks pink-purple) and can reach up to 2 feet tall when grown in a container. It too has the toxic sap if you cut it so beware. A good tip: turn it round every few weeks so that both sides of the fan get some light.

I hope to share you with you other cacti I grow in future blogs but this will do for now.

I end as always with a relevant silly joke:

'What did the boy cactus say to the girl cactus? We make a prickly pair!'

I hope I have inspired you to get your own pet cactus.

Adios amigos,

Miles👦🏻💜🌵